Numbed
by thelittleowel
Summary: My first chapter fic. Anyone remember Brian Cassidy? Well neither did Olivia until... well, you'll just have to see! Please R&R! CHAPTER FIVE up! YAY! and gasp...a pairing! (sort of)...
1. Resurfaced

Title: Numbed  
  
Author: ArtemisEyes14  
  
Rating: PG-13ish  
  
Disclaimer: Consider all of the SVU characters my Christmas gift from Dick Wolf. *Sigh*, I only wish. I'm just borrowing them. They're his.  
  
A/N: Hello, all. Okay, this is my first attempt at a SVU fic w/ chapters and stuff, not just a one-shot, so be nice. I have ideas, but suggestions are still greatly appreciated. Now, there's one thing I have to tell you. There's an *aha!* moment at the end of this chapter, but if you haven't watched any of the first 13 episodes of the show, you probably won't understand it. Brian Cassidy was a detective in the SVU in the first season (played by Dean Winters). He couldn't take all the emotionalness (nice word, I know), so Cragen transferred him to narcotics. Ah, see, but not before he and Olivia had a little fling. So be warned, there will be tension here.  
  
Olivia fiddled aimlessly with the binder clip that had held the pages upon pages of Paige Lohan's file together. Another case closed. Olivia leaned far back in her chair and propped her black leather boots up on the desk, awaiting, or rather, dreading, another assignment from the captain. She was tired. She could barely hold up her eyelids. She wanted to nuzzle underneath her covers and go to sleep in her own bed, though she knew her unrelenting insomnia would never let her.  
  
But the victims were more important than her sleep deprivation, which is why Olivia kicked herself when she found herself thinking 'Oh no,' as a young girl wandered into the squadroom. Was she really that selfish? She didn't need sleep. From the looks of it, the girl had been through much worse than a few nights without any shut-eye.  
  
The child - if about fifteen really warranted that term - had deep auburn hair pulled back in a headband. It looked as though it had once been immaculate, but now was knotted and tangled. She wore a white polo shirt and a baby blue kilt with a tear up the side. She was slender, with toned legs and a pale complexion. Bruises were beginning to form on her cheeks and neck. Her eyes were red, a result of crying, but her irises were a light aquamarine color. Even through the tears, they scintillated. She reminded Olivia of Snow White. The girl shuddered with a light sob, looked the detective in the eye, and uttered a single word. "Hi."  
  
"Hi there," Olivia replied in her gentle tone. "I'm Olivia. Can I help you?" She asked the question out of courtesy, though she could already tell why the girl was here. Liv had been working in SVU for almost 7 years; she had learned to read people, read vics. And if she was right, she could do very little to help her.  
  
"Um, w-well..." the girl stuttered, obviously shaken. She pulled her kilt around her tighter. "I was." she trailed off, then started over. "I was raped."  
  
Olivia sighed in sadness. "Okay, honey, why don't I take you into this room, alright, and you can tell me about it." She led the girl into the interview room and pulled out a chair for her. The girl sunk into the chair and Olivia sat down across from her. She smiled wearily at the young woman, a futile attempt at restoring her confidence. "What's your name?"  
  
"Giselle," she answered, staring down at her lap. "Giselle Kennedy."  
  
"And how old are you, Giselle?" Olivia held her breath, not really wanting to hear the truth.  
  
"I'll be sixteen in three weeks." Breathing out, Olivia felt a pang of sorrow. Fifteen. Her life was over at fifteen.  
  
"Alright, Giselle, well, can I get you anything? Anything to eat, to drink?" Olivia asked, mostly for the girl's benefit but also for her own. Olivia's eyes threatened to shut completely if she didn't get some caffeine soon.  
  
"No, I'm okay, really." A tear dropped from Giselle's cheek into her lap. In a moment, her tone changed from confused and terrified to quite frank. "I just want to make my statement, go to the hospital for a rape kit, and go home."  
  
Olivia was slightly taken aback at her knowledge of standard police procedure, and at her sudden emotional switch. Usually victims weren't so businesslike about reliving their attacks. "Okay. How do you know so much about police work?"  
  
"My stepdad's a detective." Giselle paused. "Narcotics."  
  
"Oh," Olivia answered, interested and offended at the same time. What kind of sick bastard would rape a cop's stepdaughter? "And what's his name?" she asked.  
  
"You won't tell him, will you?" Giselle asked hesitantly, returning to her original frightened manner. Olivia shook her head. Giselle seemed to ponder this response for a moment, then answered. "Brian. Detective Brian Cassidy."  
  
I know that was kind of short, but it will be continued soon, I promise. Like I said, feedback is always welcome. Please. See, I asked nicely, now how can you refuse? 


	2. Inhibitions

Title: Numbed  
  
Author: ArtemisEyes14  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Disclaimer: I got an iPod for Christmas. Which is nice, but I didn't get the SVU characters. Which means that they are still Dick Wolf's. Stupid Santa. Wait, I just realized that I mentioned a brand in my disclaimer! Wow, totally defeats its purpose. I don't own iPod either, Apple does. Or Heineken, btw. So there you go.  
  
A/N: WOW! I have never had so much feedback in my life! 13 reviews so far for only 854 words! My self esteem has skyrocketed! Hehe. Well, all I can say is, keep it up, you guys ROCK!  
  
Brittany/ catnamedzane: I tried to separate them, I don't know why it didn't copy in from Word. I'm trying something different this chapter, we'll just have to see if it works!  
  
Alex: Thanks! I do like punctuation. As for your question, Elliot calls her that sometimes (e.x., Inheritance: they catch the guy but Olivia's like still beating him up kind of and Elliot goes "Liv. We got him" in a fruitless attempt to calm her down- I just saw that one last night.), but I was just trying to break up the shes and the Olivias. Otherwise it sounds funny.  
  
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Brian Cassidy. Brian Cassidy. The words had been echoing in Olivia's head since Giselle first uttered them, and continued to do so as she flopped down on the couch in her small Manhattan apartment and poured herself a drink. Brian Cassidy. A father? Well, stepfather, but it still didn't make sense to her. That meant he was married. To whom, she wondered? The last time Olivia had spoken with Brian, he was still in SVU. He was still so young, so naive, following John Munch around like a puppy. Olivia chuckled to herself, remembering how Brian used to mess up all the technical terms of the SVU, like frottage, or necrophilia.  
  
Olivia threw her head back as she finished off her glass of champagne. She rarely treated herself to more than beer, but it had been a long day, she needed quality alcohol. Actually, the champagne was really cheap, far from quality. After all, she was only a cop. But it made her feel better about herself. That is, she wasn't downing Heinekens; she was downing nice, bubbly alcohol in a pretty glass. She needed that. Whatever she was drinking, she could only hope it would block out the less pleasant memories of Brian.  
  
But alcohol was never reliable, Olivia thought. Look what it had done to her mother. And so those memories still slipped through, the ones that didn't make her chuckle. The night they had spent together. How she had broken her rule. How cold she had been to him. Elliot's advice; how he had known about she and Brian right off the bat. And more so, how cold Brian had been to her, even when she was sweet to him. How badly he had taken it when she told him it wasn't personal.  
  
No one had really said anything when Cassidy left. Jeffries just took over his spot as Munch's partner; Cragen simply told them he had transferred to narcotics. There was never a why involved. The squad understood without it being spoken. Brian had never been meant for Special Victims. He wasn't up to it. The emotion of it all was bound to take a toll on him at some point. One day it did, and he just disappeared into thin air.  
  
Olivia realized what she was doing once she had finished her fifth or sixth glass of champagne. She set the glass down next to the bottle on her coffee table and pulled the red chenille throw closer around her. That's where all this had began, anyway. She and Brian had gotten drunk, and the alcohol it had done just what all the doctors say it does, and just what it was meant to do. Lowered their inhibitions. They didn't think about the consequences of spending the night together. Thank god Olivia had gotten called in that night, so it ended where it did.  
  
Not that it ever ended, really. In fact, just thinking about it now, it was still going on, wasn't it?  
  
Olivia glanced at her watch. It was 11:45, roughly. Her watch, her big silver watch. Brian had brought that watch to her at work, when she had left it behind that night after they -  
  
Was everything going to remind her of Cassidy now? She hadn't thought about him in years, now he'd resurfaced and even checking the time culminated in another thought about Brian? It wasn't even as if she had loved him.  
  
This thought brought Olivia to another internal question. Should she be reassigned, not handle Giselle's case? If her watch, her champagne made her think of Brian, certainly seeing his daughter would. And Giselle deserved compassion, and caring, and everything they train cops to give rape victims. Not Olivia's personal problems. Brian wasn't even a part of this case. 'No,' she thought to herself, 'I can handle this case. I've done it a hundred times. I'm strong. The victims come first.'  
  
Come to think of it, actually, Olivia had seen Brian since he left the unit, at a couple of police functions. She'd watched him from afar, but never dared to talk to him, always remembering how they had last left it. She had seen him once with a pretty redhead. That's right, Olivia remembered, because she had been` surprised at herself for letting out the green eyed monster. A pretty redhead who looked a lot like Giselle Kennedy. But Olivia never in her wildest dreams would have thought that woman was Brian's wife.  
  
It was nearly twelve. Olivia had been so tired earlier, now the thought of going to sleep almost repulsed her. But she had to get up early, get Giselle's rape kit results from the lab. Which didn't seem promising, as the girl's attacker wore a condom. And she had to fill Elliot in on the details of the case so far, since he had left early yesterday for Elizabeth's piano recital. And then she had to go to Sacred Heart and talk to some of Giselle's teachers. So she had to go to sleep. She had to.  
  
Olivia got up off the couch and turned off her CD player, which, call her crazy, was playing Enrique Iglesias' new CD, at, she realized, a considerably louder volume than she had noticed. She was surprised she hadn't gotten any threatening phone calls from her neighbors yet. She stumbled towards her bed, inadvertently knocking into the screen that separated her living room from her bedroom. She crawled under the sheets, set her gun on the shelf above the bed, and flicked off the light. She sighed to herself. Man, was her head going to hurt in the morning.  
  
Tbc! 


	3. Investigation

Title: Numbed  
  
Author: ArtemisEyes14  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Disclaimer: All the Law and Order: SVU characters are Dick Wolf's, not mine. I just think they are super cool. Also, I don't really know if I need this, but Sacred Heart's a real school in NYC. It's also not mine. I mean, I didn't invent it. All the teachers and stuff are mine though. I made them up. Yeah. BTW, HAPPY NEW YEARS to everyone! It is 2004!  
  
A/N: Thanks again for all the reviews, you all rock. Also, thanks to Kris for the idea of jealousy of Elliot in the Olivia/Brian relationship (so cute). I wouldn't have thought to bring it into the story w/o you!  
  
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"Brian Cassidy? As in, John's old partner Brian Cassidy?" Elliot asked incredulously. It was 9:30 a.m., and Elliot and Olivia were on their way to the lab to pick up the results of Giselle's rape kit. "He's married?"  
  
"Apparently," Olivia answered tersely. She was in no mood to talk about Cassidy, and she had promised herself she wouldn't let her personal feelings get in the way of Giselle's case as she had with so many others. All she had wanted to do was fill Elliot in on the case so far. Paying attention to her thoughts, Olivia didn't notice the red light ahead of her, and the sedan screeched to a halt.  
  
"Good lord, Liv!" Elliot yelped as he was flung against the glove compartment. He straightened his seat belt and returned to his original train of thought. "Are you sure it's the same guy? The same Cassidy? The Cassidy I knew wasn't ready for love." He thought back to his conversations nearly five years before with his partner. She had sought his advice about what do to when she hadn't wanted to continue her relationship with Brian. Cassidy had been smitten with Olivia, but he was young, and he didn't know how to make a long term relationship work. Elliot knew Bri wouldn't have treated Olivia the way she deserved. He wasn't as mature as her. He wouldn't be committed to her. Or maybe Elliot was wrong, and it was only Liv who wasn't committed. Either way, he knew he had been protective, and he knew he had been jealous. And he knew he had felt guilty.  
  
Olivia was getting annoyed. She didn't want to think about the mistakes she had made with Brian any more, and her pounding headache was only making matters worse. "Yes, Elliot!" she snapped. "It's him okay? The same Cassidy. You sound like a woman," she scoffed. "'He wasn't ready for love.'"  
  
Elliot laughed to himself. He continued to question his partner, though he knew he was on thin ice. "Has Giselle talked to her parents yet?" Olivia shook her head in response. "Have you?" Elliot asked.  
  
"She asked me not to. When Giselle is ready, she'll talk to them," Olivia retorted.  
  
"Liv, you know they'd want to know. Just like any other case, they deserve to know. Especially Brian, he knows how to help her through this. But he can't help if he doesn't know it's happened."  
  
"It's her choice Elliot! Drop it." Olivia nearly screamed. Lowering her voice, she continued. "Anyway, Cassidy should know the signs; it's his own fault if he doesn't." She knew this wasn't true, but she just didn't want to deal with it.  
  
Elliot was starting to get frustrated with his partner. He was also worried about her driving skills in this kind of mood, as she screeched around a corner. He let his mouth get ahead of his thoughts. "This wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that you slept with him, would it?" Elliot didn't realize what he had said until it came out; he braced himself for Olivia's reply.  
  
Sure enough, Olivia pulled abruptly over to the side of the road, turned off the engine, and looked Elliot directly in the eye. Her voice was icy. "It has nothing to do with that. I would never let a relationship get in the way of a case. Screw you, Elliot." Olivia pulled out and started driving again. The detectives sat in silence for a few minutes. Simultaneously, they spoke. "I'm sorry."  
  
Olivia continued first. "I had a late night and ... I'm sorry, I'm just. not having a good day."  
  
Elliot replied "Well, I'm sorry for what I said. I was out of line."  
  
Another several minutes of silence passed. Olivia broke it alone this time as she pulled into another spot. "We're here."  
  
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An hour and a half later, the detectives were in a hallway crowded with girls in blue kilts - Sacred Heart on 91st street, Giselle's school. "Cassidy's wife must be raking in the cash," Elliot noted. "My kids are in public school."  
  
"I wish we'd gotten something off the rape kit. A fiber, a hair, anything." Olivia struggled to make her voice heard over all the noise of the teenage girls. Some looked sorrowful, but some where chatting as if this was a normal day. Perhaps they hadn't heard about their classmate's rape, or perhaps they didn't care. Both detectives hoped it was the former.  
  
"Well, maybe we'll get a lead off this teacher. Supposedly they were close," Elliot reasoned. "What's her name?"  
  
Olivia checked her notebook. "Um.Marielle Proctor. Room 276. Cap thinks if there were any signs of something like this happening, well, this was an adult Giselle trusted; maybe she shared them. Here's the room."  
  
Elliot pushed open the large oak door. At the teacher's desk sat a slight, raven-haired woman in her early thirties. She was very stylish, in a sleek black suit and red button-up and shoes. She wore glasses that reminded the detectives of Alex Cabot. Behind the frames, her amber-colored eyes were distant and sad. "Hi. I suppose you're here about Giselle," she said with a light French accent.  
  
"Yes, Miss Proctor," Elliot answered, flashing his badge. "We hear you two were very close."  
  
"Giselle is so sweet. She's very, very bright in my film class. She could have a real future in directing." Marielle paused, as if awaiting approval from the detectives. When they simply continued to stare at her, she continued, sighing. "I have been worried about her for a while now."  
  
"Why's that, Miss Proctor?" Olivia cut in.  
  
"Marielle, please. She's been dating this boy, Dana. I've never met him, and she only ever says good things about him. But she's been coming in to school with bruises, cut lips. I thought maybe she had gotten herself into a relationship that she couldn't handle." The teacher's eyes were tearful.  
  
"She said she was raped on the way home, by a stranger. Do you think she could have been lying?" Elliot asked.  
  
Marielle answered timidly, and shrugged her shoulders. "It is possible."  
  
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"No." Giselle stated firmly. "It wasn't Dana. He loves me. He never laid a hand on me. I had a black eye because I got hit in the face with a softball at practice. That's it, I promise. Miss Proctor's just being protective. Plus, Dana had lacrosse after school, just ask his coach."  
  
"Giselle," Olivia said soothingly, not buying it. They had brought the girl down to the station and confronted her about her teacher's accusations, but Giselle maintained Dana had never harmed her. Olivia had been trying to convince her to admit to the abuse for nearly three quarters of an hour. "It's okay, he can't hurt you now."  
  
"It wasn't him!" Giselle shouted, fed up. Elliot was glad that the incident room was soundproof, or the girl would have woken up everyone in the crib.  
  
"Okay, okay," he broke in. "Giselle, were you and Dana sexually active?"  
  
Giselle was breathing heavily and staring at her lap. "No," she answered, "I'm a virgin. Or, I was. But I don't understand why this is important. I told you it was a stranger. I was grabbed on my way home from school."  
  
"Okay, sweetheart, okay," Olivia tried to calm the girl, but her mind was elsewhere. Brian. What he used to see every day- rape, violence- his own stepdaughter was living through it. His ex-girlfriend, if you could really call her that, was helping her through it. And he didn't have a clue. 


	4. Maybes

Title: Numbed  
  
Author: ArtemisEyes14  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Disclaimer: All Law and Order: SVU characters are Dick Wolf's. He created them and I did not. I also did not invent post-its.  
  
A/N: Oh my goodness, it's been more than a month since I last posted! My story was pushed back to #70! So sorry for the wait. If you don't want to keep reading, if you've forgotten what this story is about, even, I totally understand, it's my fault. Going back to school bogged me down with a TON of work, plus I had pneumonia. But I'm back now! If you do read (please do!), don't forget to make my day and send me a review!  
  
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Olivia stared at her phone. This wasn't the first time she had sat on the edge of her bed, trying to gather the confidence to call Brian Cassidy. It was almost as if the experience was a flashback to five years before, though then, the call was personal. This was strictly business.  
  
She was about to reach for the phone when it rang. She drew back, startled, then checked the caller I.D. The number was the same as the one on the pink post-it she was holding. The number she had looked up that day, succumbing to Elliot's nagging, agreeing to tell Brian about Giselle's rape. The number she was getting up the nerve to call. Cassidy's cell phone. She picked up the phone.  
  
"Benson," she said into the receiver.  
  
"Olivia?" a deep voice questioned. She hadn't heard that voice in a long time.  
  
"Brian. Hi," she brought herself to utter. How much did he know? She should have called him sooner.  
  
"Olivia," he seemed to state. "Wow, it's been a while. Hey. How've you been?" Olivia noted that Cassidy seemed unsettlingly calm for a man who had just found out his stepdaughter had been raped. Maybe he hadn't found out at all. Olivia's heartbeat was racing, and she wasn't quite sure why.  
  
"Same old, same old, you know. This case, that case. And you?" she answered nervously. If he didn't know already, Olivia didn't want to bring up the rape. But why else would he call her? On her home phone line?  
  
"Not so great, actually. I just had a long conversation with my wife, Julia. She informed me that my stepdaughter had been, um, raped. And that Giselle had given her your name. So I told her I'd call you, and see if there was some reason you didn't feel you could call me, tell me. And find out some specifics. And catch up with you." So he did know, Olivia thought. Why, then, was he so laid back about it? Maybe it was the effect of having seen the same sort of horrible things, day after day. Maybe he had been numbed.  
  
"Brian, you know I can't discuss the details of-."  
  
Cassidy cut her off. "Liv, I don't think this is something we should really do over the phone. Let's meet." Olivia was about to protest, but Cassidy spoke over her. "How about Chauncey's. I assume you guys still hang out there, and I haven't been there in years. You up for it?"  
  
Olivia knew she should say no. She knew it and she wanted to with all of her being. But she couldn't bring herself to. "Okay," she replied. "Half an hour." Oh God, she sighed, as she hung up the phone. It wasn't strictly business anymore.  
  
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When Olivia walked through the doors, she saw Brian already sitting at the bar. Though it wasn't a trait you would expect from him, he always had been punctual. He got up when he saw her and walked towards her. "Olivia Benson," he said as he looked her up and down. "You look amazing."  
  
"Thanks, Bri," she replied, though she felt slightly uncomfortable with the compliment. That and the hand he had placed on her back, guiding her to the bar. For courtesy's sake, though, she paid him a compliment too. "You look..grown up."  
  
It was the truth. Brian didn't seem like a little boy anymore. He had put on a little weight, mostly in muscle, it seemed, and he had certainly gained some confidence. He was almost..sexy. Maybe she should never have broken it off with him. Olivia winced at the thought, and tried to erase it from her mind. This wasn't about the two of them, she told herself, it was about Giselle.  
  
Brian laughed. "Um, thanks, I guess." The two sat down. Olivia felt awkward, but Brian looked completely comfortable. His cavalier attitude towards the issue at hand made Olivia uneasy. For a second she thought she detected a hint of anger in him, but the momentary flicker passed, and Olivia's attention shifted to the bartender.  
  
"Hey Detective Benson," he greeted her. "The usual?"  
  
"Actually, Michael, I'm just gonna go for a club soda tonight, thanks," Olivia answered, remembering the last time she had gotten drunk with Cassidy. She definitely didn't want to go there. No.  
  
"And you," Michael asked looking at Cassidy.  
  
"Scotch on the rocks, thanks," he replied. Apparently he had fonder memories of that evening than Olivia, or he had chosen to forget it altogether. Brian turned his attention back to her and began to speak. "So, Liv, how's everyone at the one-six?"  
  
Olivia answered hesitantly. "Um, they're okay. Elliot's fine, I guess you heard Jeffries left not too long after you, and Munch is, well, Munch." She paused. "Brian, I think maybe we should talk about the more important issue here."  
  
Cassidy sighed. "Giselle," he said. "Olivia, can I ask you, do you think she's telling the truth about this..rape?"  
  
Olivia was puzzled, and she stated so. "What do you mean?"  
  
Cassidy paused a moment before starting. "I love my wife," he began. Olivia scoffed at the statement. He still had his arm around her, and was fingering her navy blue sweater. Maybe she was misconstruing his advances, but she thought this was probably not a scene Cassidy would want this Julia to see. He started over. "Liv, Giselle's been kind of a troublemaker from the get-go. She doesn't like me much. She knows I used to work in SVU, that I have friends there. I can't help but wonder if maybe this isn't a, well, a kind of personal attack on me."  
  
So that was why Brian had seemed less than concerned for his stepdaughter. Cassidy never had been one to trust people, Olivia thought, remembering Harper Andersen. That was the case their relationship, or whatever it was, had started with. And ended with. But he should have known. Giselle had been raped. SVU had taught Olivia to weed out the less than truthful "victims" from the real ones; it should have taught Cassidy that too.  
  
Maybe she was a little too personally involved, a little too emotional, or maybe not, but Olivia was irritated by Cassidy's careless attitude towards Giselle's assault. Her feelings of discomfort and nervousness and hesitation and even, to some extent, regret were instantly replaced with anger. "Get over yourself Brian," she said with scorn. "Your stepdaughter was raped, and all you want to do is talk about old times, to catch up? This isn't about you, it's not about us, it's about HER. Can't you show a little concern for Giselle?" And with that, Olivia stormed out of the bar. 


	5. Unprofessional

Title: Numbed  
  
Author: ArtemisEyes14  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Disclaimer: The SVU characters still aren't mine, and I can't persuade Dick Wolf to give 'em to me. Gosh darn it.  
  
A/N: Well, while I do believe that people on TV have no morals and should stop running around behind one another's backs, there are also times when I wish people would forget their stupid morals because they are meant to be. And then there are those times when I want both, and SVU is always one of those times. So the gist of that is, I've introduced a semi-pairing of OE, but not really. I tried to please both of the little voices in my head. And as always, please R&R. I was slightly disappointed with feedback last time, even though it was totally my fault for not updating sooner. Just, hit the purple button. You know the drill.  
  
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Olivia couldn't bring herself to go home after confronting Cassidy. So, though it was the first day in months she had got off early, she headed back to the precinct. Expecting to be the only one there, Olivia was surprised to see her partner still sitting at his desk, poring over files. Usually when Elliot had time off, he went straight home to Queens. It was now nearing ten and he remained in the squadroom. But then again, the day was shaping up to be the opposite of everything Olivia thought she knew; she was tired and confused, and flopped down into her chair with a sigh.  
  
The action startled Elliot, who had been engrossed in his paperwork and evidently hadn't sensed his partner's presence. "What are you doing here so late?" he inquired with an air of concern.  
  
"I could ask the same of you," Olivia responded with a laugh, putting Elliot more at ease. "I don't have a wife and kids who probably don't even recognize me."  
  
"Something doesn't feel right on this case," Elliot said, shoving the file across the piles of papers that covered their workspace. As the folder slid from desk to desk, a photo of a black and blue Giselle Kennedy fell out. Elliot looked Olivia directly in the eye; her smile disappeared. "Plus, I was worried about you. I thought you might call, after talking to Cassidy. I decided to stay in the city, in case. Because even if you'd needed me, I wouldn't have endured an extra commute back and forth from Queens," he teased. "So how'd it go?"  
  
Olivia groaned; Elliot understood. He hadn't exactly expected it to go well. "He didn't believe her, Elliot. It was as if he didn't even care. He made it all about him, how she didn't like him, how she was a trouble maker. Bastard. He's married, his stepdaughter's been raped, and all he wants to do is hit on me." Olivia crossed her arms on her desk and laid her head down on them. Elliot stood up and walked over to the exasperated Olivia. He sat on the edge of her desk and tousled her short locks.  
  
"Wow," Elliot said, taking in the news. "Not that I blame him," he added sincerely. "Olivia, this job's tough. I don't know why Brian thinks the way he does...why he's changed... but you believe Giselle. We believe Giselle. We can help her, and that's what counts. You can't let Cassidy's behavior get in the way of helping this girl. If she can't trust her stepfather, well, we can give her someone to trust."  
  
Olivia raised her head and looked Elliot in the eye. "If this happened to Maureen, or Kathleen, or even Lizzie, they would need you to believe them. They would need to be able to trust their dad. Even if she has us, Giselle needs a dad too. She needs Cassidy."  
  
"You can't make him believe her, Liv. I don't know why Cassidy's become such a jerk over the past five years, but you can't change that. You tried to convince him and it didn't work." He urged, "Now let's get back to looking for Giselle's rapist."  
  
Olivia had tried to keep her cool but was obviously starting to cry. Elliot placed his hand on her shoulder and whispered "C'mere."  
  
Olivia stood up; Elliot embraced his tearful partner. They stood like that for some time, until Olivia broke the silence. "I'm sorry," she whispered, stepping back and holding his shoulders arms length away. "El, I'm sorry I was a jerk to you today and I'm sorry I've spent more time thinking about Brian than catching Giselle's attacker." Elliot said nothing, but brought Olivia back into his arms, still weeping. She fit perfectly against his body.  
  
After a while, her crying subsided and Olivia spoke again. "I'm sorry that you had to see me like this. I'm such a mess. And I'm sorry to keep you away from Kathy."  
  
"Liv, stop apologizing. It's okay. Everything's okay." Olivia always worried about Elliot's marriage. She knew how hard it was to have any relationship; in SVU your only real relationship was with the victims. But Elliot had explained the whole situation to his wife. Kathy was fine with it. She knew Elliot was a good guy, and there were certain things he felt obliged to do. Olivia was his friend, and she needed his help.  
  
"Okay," Olivia simply said. She gazed at Elliot, his pointed features and his crystal blue eyes. She had worked like this for a long time. Too long. She put her hand on the back of Elliot's head and pulled him close to her face, softly putting her lips to his. They lingered like that for a moment, both in a state of disbelief at what Olivia had taken the initiative to do. Elliot suddenly pulled away.  
  
"Olivia..." he began, shocked.  
  
"Listen, Elliot, I've been sorry about a lot of things tonight, but not that," Olivia interrupted, her teary eyes glittering in the dim light. "I know you're married, and I know that after Brian I promised myself I wouldn't do... this... again. But don't deny you've wanted it for a long time too."  
  
"Liv," Elliot started again, "I have a wife. And I have Maureen and Kathleen and Dickie and Liz. And you're beautiful and sexy and probably my best friend in the world, and sure, I'd be jealous of any man who had you. But I can't do this." He took a deep breath, trying to remain calm, trying to hold to his principles. "You're upset. Look how your relationship with Brian has impaired your judgment on this case. We're a team, and we can't do that to the victims. Or to Kathy. It's a kiss and it's over; nothing more can happen from here."  
  
"Elliot..." Olivia began, when she was sure his argument was over. She seemed to think about her next words for a while, until she finally chose. "I understand." Disappointedly, she added, "It was nice, though... You're a good man. To your family. Strong. I admire it. Listen, I gotta go, early day tomorrow, but I'll see you in the –" Olivia was cut off by the old- fashioned ring of her desk phone. "Benson," she answered in typical police style.  
  
"Olivia?" whimpered the voice on the other end of the line. "I-I-... I'm sorry it's late. He tried...," the voice apologized, trailing off.  
  
"Giselle?" Olivia inquired, "He tried what? Are you okay?" She shot Elliot a worried glance.  
  
"It's kind of cold out here. I stole B-Brian's phone..." the girl said before she broke into sobs.  
  
"Where are you Giselle?" Olivia asked.  
  
"I d-don't really know," she stuttered. "I just ran until I couldn't run any more. I'm somewhere in Central Park."  
  
"Okay, we're going to come get you, okay honey? Just stay where you are." Olivia hung up the phone and gathered her things. Keys...check. Badge...check. Gun...check. She looked at Elliot, who was staring at her somewhat absentmindedly. He loved how compassionate his partner could be. "Elliot," she said, snapping him out of it, "we have to go get Giselle. I think she ran away." Olivia paused. "Listen El...thanks. For tonight. For listening to me whine about Brian. For comforting me. And for... you know... I needed it."  
  
Elliot smiled at her with almost an air of pity. He didn't want their encounter to ruin the deep friendship they had. His partner had made an error in judgment, but that was it. The incident could be forgotten. His thoughts were interrupted, however, by Olivia planting another quick kiss on his lips. "If this is never going to happen again, I may as well get one for the road," she teased. "Now, Olivia," she said out loud to herself, dabbing the corner of her eye with a tissue, "compose yourself. It's time to be professional." 


End file.
